gag

I feel like throwing out the window, just to see if life would be better -- IBM Computer included. I wonder what that would cost me apart from my job. It's a good thing, that though I do sit near a glass panel of the building, it's not really a window I could open and just throw everything out to.

It's funny because I think nothing would feel better than a brat-fit, where I can just scream out my lungs, throw things out (and worry about it later), or spit blood and bile if I would have to. I refuse to admit that I am feeling much worse than before because I am affected by books. Ha-ha.

Last on my reading list was the Twilight Series and well yes, a good friend named Nats just had to show it to my face that I was somehow like Bella. I wallow and for times uncountable, I am melodramatic on occasions. haha (Ouch, but what the* - I hate it when that happens)

Anyway, a few days back, (before the books, ok!?), everything was a-float. And well, until now, I still am, only the sensitivity to everything seems to be more brought to life than usual. All I am waiting for now is the time I would cry. God, that would feel good, just like the last time. :) but no sudden realization came like a few months ago. Everything could still be rationalized and everything still had an explanation. So here I am, waiting for blood to boil and that breaking point where I will just throw a big tantrum for it to go away.

Agh.