dear...

sigh, i really am truly sorry for my outburst today.  i was really just trying to get through my day.  a matter of slightly wrong timing and a combination of probing questions are not really the best combination for me.

where are you going? who are you with? is that the only person you are going out with? although i understand the intentions are nothing but friendly and chatty, it felt somewhat like an interrogation of sorts.  which didn't really fit into my mood, nor anything else in the day.  there are really just some days that i would like to get by and that i don't have to say what i did, where i went and it's not because i have anything to hide, but it's because i just want to try to get on a day without having to report something exciting or think of what to say...

my life here is quite boring.  i sleep in, i do the laundry, i go out occasionally, but i basically just try to get by.  i go to work, i try to do my work well, but there's really nothing to share.  no romances, no exciting adventures - and even if i did, i will feel slightly rebuked when i start to share.  sometimes, just listen, stop asking. your advice is truly truly valuable to me, but sometimes, just listen.  the reason why i tell you is because i want you to hear, but at the same time, i do want to try to learn and experience things my way.

i'm really sorry i was in a bad mood today - it wasn't because of you. it's always me.  but really, there are just days where i need to get by on my own, listen to myself and just be.

i'll speak to you tomorrow.  and let's hope everything gets better then.  good night.