nuninu

A lot of people don't understand the concept of being away from home. To many, working abroad seems to be the answer to a lot of problems - better income, independence, great shopping, no nagging elders.  It's a teenager's dream come true.

Today, coming home from working half day, I find myself revisiting the last 5.5 years. I tell everyone I've been away for almost 6 - it sounds more grown up that 5 and a half. After all, who counts right?  But each month or each day makes a difference.

Waking up in the morning without a shining sun, feeling sluggish and heavy, going to work which is enjoyable but has become a part of routine.  It feels miles away from that week-long vacation I just took.  Waking up from the bed you grew up in, the sun shining, the family buzzing about - the familiarity is endless and I find myself wanting back "in".

Now, everyone must think I'm crazy.  Why do you want in on a life you left years ago?  Aren't you just happy to be a bystander, a part of the audience?

I could be. But I don't think that is what I want to be, nor it is what I am called to be.

I do not know how long I could keep up with the pace of Hong Kong - I have come to blame it for the toll my body has taken - weight gain, bad sleeping habits, additional impatience, attitude issues, a slight inclination for material gain...I look back and I just think, how long could I keep up?

Can I change the minute I go home? What will it be like?  How would everyone react?  I have about 2 years to think and live things through.  Hopefully by then I have my answer.